#38: The Weight of Waiting
Another one about Saturn
I bought a weighted vest the other day and I’ve been thinking about how wearing it is ultimately going to make me lighter on my feet.
Which, naturally, led me to thinking about how diamonds are made, and the extreme heat and pressure required to create both their beauty and strength.
It’s obvious that physical weight can be utilized to manifest resiliency. But what about metaphysically? What about the heavy weight of heartbreak, of loneliness, of anxiety, of depression, of existential dread…etc. etc. etc.?
I think, whether visible or invisible, the weights we carry share the same end goal: developing a certain lightness that can only be reached in divine timing.
The time it takes to make a diamond should not be confused with the age of the diamond. Many diamonds that have been found are very old, dating back almost three billion years. But scientists say it’s likely the stone was formed and then sat around, waiting to be discovered.
It’s funny to me that “weight” sounds just like “wait” and how Saturn relates to both.
Choosing to wear a heavy weighted vest on a hike and waiting to no longer be weighed down by a heavy heart can both feel like excruciatingly long processes…but the outcome of both is the possibility of standing more confidently on your own two feet— stronger and better equipped to face the next hurtle. You just can’t predict how long it will take!
In some ways, literally, we’re required to carry weight with us. Gravity is a bugaboo that we’re forced to contend with from the moment we arrive Earth side. While invisible, it’s a force pushing us down into reality and ensuring we can’t float away from our human experience.
So, maybe we’re weighed down because we simply don’t have a choice. We wouldn’t be on this planet without a certain heaviness to our existence (a certain gravity to our existence). For better or worse, the weight we carry signifies that we’re alive.
Pisces energy, the ultimate untethered (and at least ideologically weightless) soul, is no longer so free. Saturn entered the sign last year and began barricading our favorite escape hatches. Tumbling down your favorite rabbit hole might not feel as satisfying as it once did. But, also, rather than being lost to your vices completely…a life raft may have appeared.
So sure, maybe you could’ve successfully vibed on the island of your escapist choosing like Tom Hanks & Wilson forever: ice cream island, reality tv island, dating app island…but that isn’t really reality…right? Aren’t we all glad the stranded cast away eventually built a raft and got the hell out of there?
Your own rescue (of yourself) could be setting sail on February 28th, when the Sun, Saturn, and Mercury all come together at the same point in the sky.
When any planet connects with the Sun, it’s called a “cazimi” and to have two planets pass through the heart of the Sun on the same day is pretty special.
We experience this conjunction at 9° of Pisces, so if you have any planets or points between 7°-11° of the mutable signs (Pisces, Sagittarius, Virgo, Gemini) it’s even more noteworthy.
It’s interesting, too, that this triple conjunction/double cazimi is happening on Mercury’s day (Wednesday), while Mercury is one of the planets involved. Our thought processes are being centered in our maturation equations…and, on a mundane level, that could point to some seriously depressing vibes.
To address this energy directly, especially through the end of this month, let your mind wander into the likely very deep waters of the weights that it carries. Why do you think the way you do? What’s the origin point (and where’s the subsequent release valve)? Has carrying around heavier thoughts made you stronger in some ways? How? Do some thoughts need to be discarded so your raft will be sure to float?
There’s no way around the next week or so feeling like a serious time. The weights we carry (Saturn) and the way we think about them (Mercury) will be purified and brought into a new light. If there’s a habit, goal, or mindset shift you’ve been hoping to address long term— it’s a beautiful time to commit.
I booked a rock climbing class just a few days after the exact conjunction…and it’s a very literal example of this astrology (especially because Saturn is the ruler of my 6th house!).
It’s a hobby I’ve been quietly obsessing over since going to see Free Solo with friends in late 2018. That’s five solid years of waiting and watching the sport from afar (and later in person— I visited Yosemite back in 2022) but decidedly doing nothing about it.
But now, all of a sudden, it feels like the right time to face the wall. I’ve carried the weight of some tumultuous years in between and they served to fortify my inner strength. Rather than feel blocked, dare I say, I’m ready to fucking climb.
I’ve been working on something EXTREMELY EXCITING AND SPECIAL with my friend and colleague
for many Moons and we can’t wait to share it with you soon. Circle March 20th on your calendar and keep an eye on your inbox for more updates!I’ve also been absolutely geeking over Maggie and Kacey’s new singles, made these heavenly no bake vegan cookies, and enjoyed snuggling my Libra Sun, Leo Moon, and Pisces Rising nephew all day yesterday. Baby cuddles are officially a cure to the winter blues. What’s been keeping you company this season? Don’t hesitate to drop a comment or hit “reply!”
Through time and space,
Erin River Sunday