Each winter, a word tends to come to me as a key or theme for the year I have ahead. It’s like a Christmas gift from the Universe- a few twinkling letters hinting at the journey that’s prepared to be unwrapped.
Some years it’s a gift I’m excited about and the word immediately resonates. Other years…it’s not something I would’ve chosen for myself and I curse the lack of a return policy. 2023’s word was of the latter variety.
The word began circling me in early December and I reluctantly noted its increasing appearance. It initiated and reiterated throughout a powerful year ahead reading I booked with Linzi Silverman (highly recommend <3) and continued to echo in the media I was consuming and conversations I was having.
While it wasn’t a word I would’ve elected for myself, it quickly became clear that it was exactly what I needed.
Nonattachment.
How scary! Aren’t humans meant to be attached? Aren’t we better off together? Growing research even shows social connection as a need as basic as food and shelter.
As fearful as I was of the upcoming year’s little psychic gift, I knew- underneath the anxiety, that nonattachment wouldn’t mean shunning all of my relationships. It would mean, however, that I needed to look at them, to look at my life, in an entirely new way.
Trying to comfort myself in preparation for this monumental task, I thought back to videos I’d seen of Buddhists monks and tried to remember the beauty in the brevity of their sand mandalas.
I was sure they made nonattachment look easier and more beautiful than it would feel in personal practice…but I also found solace in knowing it was possible.
2023 finally began and sure enough, nonattachment wedged itself into the nooks and crannies of my life in all caps. Around seemingly every corner…NONATTACHMENT waited for me.
And much to my chagrin, it was not a cake walk with the monks.
People, places, and things that I had entire identities centered around left my life in sudden and shocking ways. I cried (and cried, and cried), I second-guessed, and finally, I surrendered. Through it all, I repeated my new favorite magic word: Nonattachment, nonattachment, nonattachment.
I’ve learned that being attached/anchoring the foundation of yourself to anything external is a dangerous game because when that person, place, or thing inevitably changes (or disappears entirely), so will you.
It’s like when people defend getting botox because they “just want to look like themselves.” They’re attached to what they looked like at a younger age, rather than accepting that, even with wrinkles, of course they look like themselves. They ARE themselves. How sad to believe anything different.
It bears repeating that nonattachment does not mean a lack of connection. It’s more about maintaining a boundary between where you end and everything external begins.
This concept can be witnessed in the extremely powerful, yet somehow often ignored magic of spelling: When asked “What’s your sign?” most people respond by saying “I’m an Aries” or “I’m a Gemini” without a deeper thought.
But what if they said “my Sun is in Aries” or “my Sun is in Gemini” instead? The question is still being answered, but by being more conscious, the person is not also over identifying with/attaching to their response.
Bearing all of this in mind, we’re now in eclipse season, with the first one arriving just after midnight est on Wednesday. This New Moon Solar Eclipse will be at 29° Aries, the anaretic degree. This is not manifestation energy. I repeat: this is not manifestation energy.
As tempting as it may be to try and control a certain outcome…eclipses (and especially ones at 29°) are a potent opportunity for, you guessed it, nonattachment. More so than other lunations, the wheel is already in motion now and it’s best if we just witness the unfoldings. Whatever happens, or doesn’t, is not who we are- it simply is.
Eclipses are also special moments to honor both the Sun and the Moon, the luminaries responsible for the seismic, fated shifts during these periods. I listened to the recent “The Moon: Wax on, Wax off” episode of this podcast yesterday, and it makes for beautiful contemplation in times like these.
Because Mercury will also station retrograde this week, less than 48 hours after the Aries eclipse, putting expectations on anything from now until at least May 15th is futile. And isn’t it always?
That said, let me take this moment to share the latest Mercury Retrograde candle from Birthdate Co.!
This candle, from start to finish, was created with so much intention. The scent, the included crystal, and the reading on the back were all born from a deep, intuitive understanding of this year’s specific Mercury Retrograde energies. They’re all hand-poured (with natural soy + coconut wax) in the US and truly a labor of love.
I’ll be lighting mine on April 21st and invite you to join me as we navigate yet another retrograde period. It’s the biggest honor of mine to help develop products like these with Birthdate Co., and you can experience the magic with my code “TBHMagic10” for 10% off (ps, this discount works for every product, not just the Merc Rx candle).
I’ll also remind you of my 3 of Cups Aura Spray sitting pretty over on Etsy. This spray is especially grounding, which I find helpful all the time…but definitely during eclipses combined with a Mercury Retrograde!
NOTEWORTHY
If you’re someone who appreciates dates and a little more organization, note the window of April 19th-May 5th. While *big things* can always happen, this is the period between eclipses so potent shakeups can be expected.
If you have planets or points in the final degrees (27-29) of Aries, Libra, Cancer, or Capricorn…watch the events surrounding the New Moon Solar Eclipse on April 19/20 closely. All of us should make note of beginnings or endings around this time, however, as this is just the introductory chapter of an entirely new story.
If you have planets or points in the middle degrees (13-17ish) of Scorpio, Taurus, Leo, or Aquarius, the May 5th Full Moon Lunar Eclipse could be strongly felt. Unlike the Aries one, though, this is a closing chapter in 2023.
If you have planets or points in Cancer and/or Leo, eclipses will always be important for you. These signs are ruled by the Moon (Cancer) and the Sun (Leo) and are therefore heavily influenced by eclipse energy every year, no matter the sign where they’re occurring.
And finally, the North Node enters Aries and the South Node enters Libra on July 17th, 2023 (this is where eclipses happen).
Offensive actions will take precedence over amiability. Rocking the boat will be more desirable than keeping the peace.
You’re likely to notice people- and ‘people’ includes you, becoming more selfish (for better and worse) and autonomous. We’ll all be working on releasing the shadow Libran qualities of codependency and people pleasing as we discover who we were born to unapologetically become.
If you’re familiar with your birth chart, or want to be, notice what houses Aries and Libra govern. These are the areas of life you’ll be feeling this energy most acutely over this year and next.
We’re preparing for the greatest quest of them all- the journey back into ourselves, and nonattachment will be key in both weathering the storms and embracing the rainbows along the way.
Through time and space,
Erin River Sunday
Beautifully written! Chock full of good information and I’m hanging on to this newsletter as I expect to be referencing it regularly.